Just when I think I’ve let go, come to terms, coped, an echo of my past trauma proceeds to haunt me to remind me I’m damaged and abnormal.
Something mundane and natural forces me back into a different time, a different place, a different me. That clawing fear becomes a vise around my heart and the panic gets caught in my lungs and they attempt to suffocate me.
My mind becomes a weapon aimed at my soul. My body betrays me and my skin attempts to peel its way off. I become a war zone but who am I fighting?
There is no calm before the storm, no warning, no bright flash of light. Normalcy and then chaos. I become the maelstrom. It eats me alive until I’m hollow. Memories flash like slides on a screen, each one more painful than the last, leaving gouges in my heart.
Make the camera stop. Cease the storm. Take my body, tame my mind.
Make me normal again.